..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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