i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
