i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
