Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Terrible idea I love it
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
