return my video game
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Are my feet made of real feet?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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