i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
