OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
it glows. i had to have it.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
