i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Boobs are out for the taking
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
