i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
