I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize