she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
