I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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