Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
