I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
