I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
You're a waste of cheezeits
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
