I only kidnapped one of them. chill
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
