called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
my shit smells like andre
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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