Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
