There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
50% drunk capacity currently
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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