sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize