My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
he puts the penis in happiness.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize