when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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