Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize