I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
