i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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