I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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