You're completely useless in the revolution.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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