What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
