It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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