i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
