This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
