her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
The feeling are messing with the penis
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
