i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
