This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
