Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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