It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
