Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
