I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Did you pee in the oven last night??
we should paint friendship bongs
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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