she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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