he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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