guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Randomize
