I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
