You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
