i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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