Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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