I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
