Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
