i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize