Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
