Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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