The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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